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Why Being Late Sends the Wrong Message

6/15/2025

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Many of us feel like we’re constantly racing from one thing to the next. We race to make the morning workout class, then hurry home to get ready for work. We scramble to get the kids to school and ourselves to the office. From there, it’s a blur of meetings, errands, and after-work obligations. We’re expected to do all this AND be on time!
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Photo Courtesy of Canva Pro

​There are times when being late is out of our control. Traffic happens. Kids spill things. Alarm clocks fail. But when lateness becomes a habit — even just a few minutes here and there — it sends a message, and it’s probably not the one you want to send.
 
Chronic tardiness can come across as disrespectful of others’ time, disorganized, or even inconsiderate. It can give the impression that you’re not managing your responsibilities well — and that perception can hurt your professional reputation and strain your relationships. According to a Harvard Business School research paper, arriving late to work has the potential to affect the bottom line of your employer. It can also have a “spillover” effect on your co-workers, causing them to work past their original clock-out time. That might not sit well with a colleague or your employer.
 
On the flip side, being on time sends the right message — one of reliability, courtesy, and self-awareness. Those qualities build trust, strengthen your credibility, and show respect for other people’s time. And yes, it’s also just plain good manners.
 
If being on time doesn’t come naturally, here are a few small shifts that can make a big difference:
  • Know your prep time. Time yourself getting ready to see how long it really takes. For me, I need an hour to do my hair and makeup, get dressed, and gather my things. Once I know that, I can plan accordingly.
  • Lay it out the night before. Choosing your clothes and prepping your bag ahead of time prevents the morning scramble.
  • Use a reminder buffer. Set a phone alarm to leave 15–30 minutes earlier than you usually would. That extra cushion adds up to peace of mind.
  • Aim to arrive early. Plan to arrive 15 minutes early for everything. Once this becomes your habit, you’ll seldom be late.
 
A little preparation goes a long way. With just a few tweaks to your routine, you can step into your day feeling calm, prepared, and polished. And when you show up on time, you’re not just showing up — you’re showing others that you value them and yourself.
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How to Comfort Someone Mourning the Loss of a Pet

5/30/2025

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When someone is mourning the loss of a pet, oftentimes, we may struggle to find the right words to say to them. It may even be awkward for some people, especially if they have not experienced that type of grief themself. Keep in mind that for most people, a beloved pet is part of their family, and the loss they feel can be similar to what they would feel if they were to lose a family member or friend. So please don’t say to them, “It was only a pet; you’ll get over it.”
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Jack the Cat Lins

​Our cat, Jack the Cat Lins, left us earlier this month. He was 17 years old, and we had him for most of those 17 years. The loss of a pet affects everyone differently. In my case, I was very emotional for several days, and it was difficult to focus on anything other than my sadness. I didn’t want to interact with people because I wasn’t sure if I could keep my emotions intact if I were offered condolences. Everyone who reached out to me was so thoughtful and kind with their words, and I truly appreciated it.
 
During this time, it occurred to me that not everyone may be comfortable reaching out to someone who has just lost a pet or even know what to say. Here are some suggestions for various ways to show expressions of sympathy:

Reach out to them
They are grieving, and hearing from someone can help them to process their sadness. It’s okay to say something similar to what you would say if they were mourning the loss of a human family member. Here are some phrases that are pet-specific:

  • “I’m so sorry to hear about your loss of [pet’s name].”
  • “Is there anything you need?”
  • “I know how much [pet’s name] meant to you.”
  • “You were lucky to have each other all these years.”
  • “You were such a good parent to [pet’s name].”
 
Offer your assistance
Having reminders of the pet in the home can be very difficult for some people. Depending on your relationship, offer to help remove items: “Do you need help putting away their toys or bedding?”
 
Send a card or note
I received several cards and text messages after the loss of our dear Jack the Cat. Reading the kind words was comforting and they are something I can go back and read again.
 
Avoid unsolicited advice
Don’t suggest they get a new pet right away to fill the void. They may not be ready for that now or ever.
 
Avoid making it about you
Try not to compare their loss to your own. Instead, share a fond memory you have of their pet or ask them to share a memory of their own.

Suggest a way to memorialize their pet
In our situation, we had Jack the Cat cremated and placed in an urn. We also had a special plaque made for the front of the urn. For me, it was comforting to have him back in our home.
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Jack the Cat's urn and plaque

​If you’ve recently lost a pet, my heart goes out to you. I know your heart must be breaking. My own grief overwhelmed me for several days, causing me to dread seeing people. I realized I had to get back out into the world, but I also needed a way to cope with any comments without being overcome with emotion. I decided to have a go-to phrase and respond with “Thank you, I appreciate that.” It allowed me to politely accept their sympathy without breaking down in tears every time someone mentioned it.
 
I hope this helps those of you who may not know what to say or do when someone is mourning the loss of a pet, as well as those of you who are grieving the loss of your beloved pet.
 
Rest in Peace Jack the Cat Lins.
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Graduation Ceremony Etiquette

4/15/2025

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It's almost that time of year when graduation ceremonies fill stadiums and auditoriums across the country. In the past, I've shared tips on general graduation etiquette, but in this post, I want to focus more specifically on how to show respect and courtesy during the ceremony itself.
Every school has its own requirements and expectations for graduation day, so always defer to those first. That said, here are some general etiquette guidelines to keep in mind:
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Photo Courtesy of Canva Pro
Before the Ceremony
  • Respect the guest list. Most schools limit the number of tickets available for each graduate. If you weren't offered a ticket, avoid taking it personally or making the graduate feel bad—it's likely out of their control.
  • Dress for the occasion. Graduation is a milestone event. Choose attire that reflects the significance of the day. If the ceremony is outdoors, be prepared with sunglasses, a hat, and sunscreen.
  • Arrive early. Allow extra time for traffic, parking, and finding your seat. It's much more enjoyable to settle in without the stress of rushing in at the last minute.

During the Ceremony
  • Silence your devices. Before the ceremony begins, turn off or silence your phone and other electronics.
  • Follow the school's rules. Many schools ask guests to hold applause until all names have been read so each graduate is honored equally. Abide by those requests.
  • Stay seated. Avoid the temptation to leave right after your graduate walks the stage. The ceremony is a shared experience—honor all graduates by staying until the end.
  • Be mindful of photos. If you're snapping a photo or video, do so quickly and discreetly. Don't stand up, block others, or draw attention during key moments.

After the Ceremony 
  • Share the space. When reuniting with your graduate, avoid crowding pathways or gathering spots—especially popular photo areas.
  • Give them room to soak it in. This moment is often emotional. Let your graduate greet friends, take photos, and say their goodbyes without rushing them.
 
Whether cheering from the stands or snapping pics after the tassels turn, a little etiquette goes a long way in making graduation day smooth and memorable for everyone. Let's help make it a memory worth keeping—for all the right reasons.
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Your Best Version

3/15/2025

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​I’m a big proponent of becoming the best version of myself. I read a lot of books and blog posts centered around self-improvement. I sneak a fiction book in there occasionally, but I’m always drawn back to books designed to help me get better at something.
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Photo Courtesy of Canva Pro

​I’m a firm believer that everyone has the potential to get better. That’s what my classes and workshops are all about: To help people be the best version of themselves. To do this, now and then, we need to take a step back and do a bit of self-evaluation to see where we need to improve. I do this self-reflection at least once a year.

I realized I needed to work on my public speaking skills a few years ago, so I joined Toastmasters. Toastmasters is an organization that helps people develop communication and public speaking skills through practice and evaluation. Twice a month, I give impromptu speeches at our meetings. In doing this, I have become more comfortable speaking in front of a group.

If you’re reading this blog post or following me on social media, you probably have this same self-improvement mindset. My call-to-action for you is to think about where you want to improve in regard to etiquette and manners.

Improving your etiquette and manners starts with self-awareness. Take a moment to reflect on your interactions, habits, and social behaviors. Here are some key areas to consider:
  • First Impressions: Do you make eye contact, offer a firm handshake, and introduce yourself with confidence?
  • Conversational Skills: Are you a good listener? Do you interrupt or dominate conversations?
  • Dining Etiquette: Do you know basic table manners, such as using utensils correctly and not speaking with food in your mouth?
  • Professional Etiquette: Do you respond to emails promptly, show up on time, and respect others’ time in meetings?
  • Social Media Etiquette: Are your online interactions polite and professional? Do you think before you post?
  • Gratitude & Courtesy: Do you say “please” and “thank you” regularly? Do you write thank-you notes when appropriate?
  • Respect for Others: Do you practice inclusivity, avoid gossip, and treat people with kindness?
Once you’ve identified areas for improvement, set small, achievable goals. Whether you start by refining your email etiquette, improving your listening skills, or simply saying ‘thank you’ more often, every small step adds up. Etiquette isn’t about perfection—it’s about being mindful, respectful, and considerate in all situations.

Improving your etiquette and manners is a journey, and small, intentional changes can make a big difference. If you’d like more personalized guidance, I offer in-person and virtual classes, as well as my digital course, The Polished Professional, designed to help business professionals refine their skills. No matter where you are in your self-improvement journey, there’s always room to grow.  Here’s to becoming the best version of yourself!
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The Art of the Handshake

2/15/2025

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​During the height of COVID-19, handshakes disappeared almost overnight. But now, they're back—especially in business settings. Whether you're at a networking event, meeting a client, or interviewing for a job, a proper handshake sets the tone for professionalism and confidence.

​Let's break down the essentials of a great handshake so you can feel comfortable and assured every time.
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​Always Stand Up to Shake Hands
Whenever possible, stand up when shaking someone's hand. This small but powerful gesture conveys respect and engagement. If standing isn't physically possible, you can acknowledge the handshake with a friendly nod and verbal greeting.

The Perfect Handshake Technique
Your handshake should be firm but not overpowering. Here's how to execute it properly:
  • Extend your right hand with your palm facing slightly inward.
  • Aim for the "web" of your hand (the area between your thumb and index finger) to meet the other person's web. This ensures full contact.
  • Grip firmly—but not too tight or too limp. Think of it as a confident grasp, not a bone-crushing squeeze or a weak touch.
  • Maintain eye contact and smile to project warmth and confidence.

Getting the Grip Just Right
A handshake should feel natural, not forced. If you're unsure whether yours is too firm or too weak, practice with a friend or colleague. Ask for honest feedback and adjust accordingly.

How Many Pumps?
Handshakes vary slightly depending on the situation:
  • Business Setting: Two pumps are standard—up and down twice, then release.
  • Social Setting: Three pumps are more common in friendly, non-business environments.
Avoid excessive shaking, which can feel awkward or overwhelming.

When to Initiate a Handshake
In business, the person of seniority—such as the employer or senior executive—typically initiates the handshake. However, if you're meeting someone and the moment feels appropriate, extending your hand first is perfectly fine.

A Few Handshake Don'ts
  • Avoid the "limp fish" handshake. A weak grip can give the impression of insecurity or lack of enthusiasm.
  • Don't overdo the "death grip." Crushing someone's hand can make you seem overly aggressive. It also has the potential to cause pain in the other person's hand, especially if they are elderly or have arthritis in their hands.
  • Skip the "linger." Holding on too long can make the other person uncomfortable.

Final Thoughts
Your handshake is often the first impression you make—so make it count! By standing up, using the proper grip, and shaking with confidence, you'll leave a lasting, positive impact in both professional and social settings.
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Do you feel confident in your handshake? If not, grab a friend and start practicing today!

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Basic Dining Etiquette

1/15/2025

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​Manners and etiquette do not need to be complicated. Let’s get back to the basics and keep it simple. Knowing some guidelines about maneuvering a dining table will help you feel confident during your next dining experience.
Basic Place Setting
Basic Place Setting
Place Setting
A basic table setting is something that most of us use every day and it includes the following:
  • The fork is placed on the left side of the plate.
  • The knife is placed on the right side of the plate, with the blade facing inward.
  • The plate is in the center.
  • The water glass is positioned above the knife.
  • The napkin is placed to the left of the fork or on top of the plate.
Only include items on the table that will be used for the meal. In this case, a fork, knife, and glass suffice. See the photo above.

Napkins
When you sit down at the table, place your napkin on your lap. However, if you are dining in someone’s home, wait for the host or hostess to place their napkin on their lap first, then follow their lead. If they don’t place their napkin on their lap and the meal is being served, you may proceed to place yours on your lap.

There are two acceptable ways to position your napkin on your lap:
  1. Fold the napkin with the fold closest to you and the open end facing your knees.
  2. Fold the napkin with the open end closest to you and the fold near your knees.

Use the inside of the napkin to dab your mouth to remove food or sauce. When done, place the napkin back on your lap with the soiled part inside to keep it discreet. If you leave the table during the meal, place your napkin on your chair.

​When the meal is over, place the napkin to the left of your plate or where your plate was if it has been cleared.

Holding and Using Your Utensils
Hold your knife and fork with the handles resting in the palms of your hand. With the fork, turn your hand over and place your index finger at the base of the fork where the handle and tines meet. For the knife, again turn your hand over and place your index finger in the spot where the handle and blade section meet keeping your index finger straight. This short VIDEO will give you a visual explanation.

When cutting food, hold the knife in your dominant hand and the fork in your other hand. Grip the handles with the palm of your hands, turning the blade and tines downward. Place your forefingers at the spot where the blade and handle meet and on the back of the tines. Cut one or two pieces at a time and avoid holding the fork like a dagger.
  • American Style: Place your knife at the top of the plate. Switch the fork to your dominant hand and hold it like a pencil, bringing each bite to your mouth individually.
  • Continental Style: Keep the knife and fork in the same position used for cutting, then bring the fork (tines down) to your mouth while the knife rests on the plate.
    This short VIDEO will give you a visual explanation.​
Resting Position for Utensil Placement in American dining
Utensil Placement Resting Position - American Dining
When pausing during the meal, place your knife across the top of your plate with the blade facing you, and position your fork at the 4:00 mark on the plate. This signals the resting position in American dining. See the photo above.
Finished Position Utensil Placement in American dining
Utensil Placement Finished Position - American Dining
When you are finished with your meal, place your fork and knife together in the 4:20 position on the plate with the knife blade facing inward. See the photo above.

Excusing Yourself from the Table
If you need to leave the table during the meal, simply say “Excuse me” or “I’ll be right back” to those seated near you and quietly leave. There’s no need to explain where you’re going. Likewise, if someone else leaves the table, avoid asking them where they are going.

By practicing these basics daily, they will become second nature, allowing you to dine with confidence and ease. 

If you would like to learn more about dining etiquette with private lessons, please reach out to me HERE!
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5 Things To Help Start The Year Off Right

12/15/2024

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​Coming out of the holiday season and into a new year, the last thing you may have on your mind is more parties. Incorporating these five simple things into your New Year’s resolutions will make your 2025 celebrations much easier.
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My Napkin Drawer in our kitchen


1) Organize your table linens and napkins
Inspect all your table linens and napkins. Look for any stains or holes. Spot-clean the stains and launder them according to the instructions. Repair any holes and consider “retiring” a linen if the hole is in a spot that a centerpiece or other table décor can’t camouflage. Here are some tips to remove wax drippings from a tablecloth.
 
Go through your napkins and inspect them for stains. If a napkin has stains that just won’t wash out, consider using it to line a breadbasket. If it’s not bread basket worthy, repurpose it as a reusable sandwich wrap, a base for craft projects, or a cleaning rag.
 
Take an inventory of your linens and napkins, noting the color and style. Identify items that need to be replaced and also items that you need. Keep a list on a Google Doc or the Notes app on your phone. This list will be helpful when you’re out and about in the new year and come across a great sale.
 
2) Inventory your candle supply and clean your holders 
As you go through your candles, separate the candles that have seen the ‘light’ of better days (wink). Instead of tossing them, keep them stashed away for casual take-out nights that you want to elevate with a little candlelight. Note what candles need to be replaced and add it to your Google doc or phone notes.
 
Clean your candlesticks and holders, removing any wax drippings. Here’s one way to remove the wax. Soak the candlestick in hot water. I place a bowl in the sink and place the candlestick inside it. Make sure not to let any wax go down the drain. Once the wax softens, scrape it off with your fingernail. Add a little vinegar to the water if the wax is extra grimy. Instead of the hot water method, you can also use the freezer method. Definitely use this method for your silver candlesticks. Place the candlestick in the freezer for a few hours, remove it from the freezer, and pull off the wax.
 
3) Organize your recipes
Make a list of your favorite recipes and categorize them based on whether they work best for a sit-down dinner party, barbecue, cocktail, or potluck party. Review any notes you’ve added and make sure they are legible. This will help you plan your menu for your next celebration.
 
4) Who, What, When
Compile a list of what types of parties you would like to host this year: Formal dinner parties, cocktail parties, barbecues, potlucks, as well as holiday-themed parties like Galentine’s Day and Friendsgiving. Think about who you would like to invite, the menu, and recipes (refer to your organizational skills in item #3 for ideas). If you want to get even more organized, pencil in some dates on your calendar!
 
5) Make it easy to be thankful
You know I'm the Thank You Note Queen and couldn't pass up a chance to talk about Thank You Notes! Buy a set of notecards or order personalized stationery. Keep them in an easily accessible place with a roll of stamps and a pen so you'll be ready to write a thank you note when the time comes. This is also a good time to update your address list by comparing it to the return addresses on any cards you received over the holidays.
 
By taking the first few weeks of the year to get organized, you will head into the new year ready to party at a moment’s notice.
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The Perfect Holiday Party Guest

11/15/2024

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​Party season is here, and it’s time to brush up on your holiday party etiquette. Here are a few tips to be the perfect holiday party guest.
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​RSVP
When you’re invited to a party, and they ask for an RSVP, they would like to know if you will be attending. This helps the host plan for the food, seating, and other things involved when planning a party. Always respond before the due date listed on the invite. I try to make a habit of RSVPing right away so I don’t forget.
 
If you have any dietary restrictions, this would be the time to let the host know. Here’s an example: “I’m allergic to shellfish. Can I bring a dish I can eat to share with the other guests?”
 
Bringing Food or Drinks
Depending on the type and formality of the party, you may want to ask if you can bring anything. Offering to bring an appetizer, side dish, wine, or dessert is always a nice option.
 
Please do not show up with food that the host did not request. It may be a nice gesture, but it has the potential to inconvenience the host by having to find room for it on the table. Plus, they may have the menu perfectly planned, and adding another dish may not fit into the timing of the meal.
 
If you bring wine, don’t expect the host to serve it at the party. They may have planned a special wine list to accompany the meal.
 
Bringing a Gift
I don’t like to show up empty-handed when I go to a party at someone’s home. It’s a nice gesture to bring a small gift for the host or hostess. It doesn’t have to be elaborate. Here are a few of my go-to favorites:
 
Gourmet Chocolates: Most people rarely buy gourmet chocolates for themselves. A gift of chocolates is a nice treat for the host to enjoy after the party.
 
Wine or a bottle of their favorite spirit: This is an excellent gift if you know they drink alcohol. Don’t expect them to serve it at the party. When you hand it to them, let them know it’s something they can enjoy later.
 
Sparkling Wine Stopper: This is one of my favorite gifts to give. I love this because it keeps the beverage bubbly for several days after opening.
 
Candle Snuffer: Pair this fun gift with a cute box of matches and tie it up in a bow.
 
Tea Towels or Napkins: These are special gifts if you know their color scheme and decorating style.
 
Something made by a local artisan in your community: A candle, cooking oil, or honey from a local beekeeper are unique gifts that also help support a local business.
 
Specialty spices: This would be a welcome gift for someone who loves to cook.
 
Imported or specialty cheese: A gift of cheese with a special cheese knife is a nice touch. Again, this is something for them to enjoy at a later time.

Flowers: A word about flowers - If you bring flowers, make sure they are in a container. This prevents the host from having to look for a container in the middle of greeting their guests.
 
Be a Good Guest
Being a good guest means being on time. Arrive within 15 minutes of the designated start time of the party. If it’s a sit-down dinner party and you realize you are going to be late, I suggest calling the host to let them know. Avoid arriving early for a party. The host may be doing some last minute party prep or may not even be dressed yet!
 
The perfect party guest is someone who enjoys the company of the other guests. What I mean is mingle. Don’t sit in the corner and keep to yourself. Visit with the other guests. If you don’t know someone, introduce yourself. Here’s a great conversation starter: “How do you know the host?”
 
Depending on the type of party, you can offer to help the host. A simple: “Is there something I can help you with?” will give the host an opportunity to delegate a task if needed.
 
Don’t Overstay Your Welcome
As the evening winds down, take cues from the host. Has the dessert and coffee been served and eaten? Has the music been turned down or off? Has the host started clearing their plates?

Depending on the formality of the party, you can offer to help clean up. If the host declines your offer, leave it as is. Don’t circumvent their wishes and start clearing the table.

Also, make sure to thank the host before you leave. You don't want to be that guest who sneaks out without expressing gratitude. Even it's a casual party, search out the host before leaving.
 
After the Party
You can send them a quick text or give them a call the next day telling them how much you enjoyed the party. I also suggest sending a handwritten thank you note. It takes a little more effort, but it shows how much you appreciate the host and the work that went into putting on the party.
 
I promise you will be invited back if you follow these simple steps!
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Mastering Email Etiquette

10/15/2024

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​Trust me, email is not dead! In today's fast-paced digital world, email still remains a primary means of communication, especially in professional settings. However, how we manage our email interactions can make a big difference in how we are perceived by colleagues, clients, and potential partners. Email etiquette ensures that communication is clear, respectful, and professional. Here are some key aspects of email etiquette to keep in mind.
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Response Time: How Quickly Should You Reply?
The appropriate response time for emails can vary based on your industry and role. However, as a general rule, aiming for a response within 24-48 hours is good practice. In some industries, like customer service or sales, an even quicker response may be expected. If you're unable to provide a complete response within this timeframe, acknowledge the email with a simple "Received" or let the sender know you'll follow up within a specified time ("I'll get back to you by [date/time]") shows respect for the sender's time and keeps communication flowing smoothly. When you provide a timeframe for follow-up, it's important to stick to it. This reliability builds trust and reflects positively on your professionalism.
 
Crafting the Perfect Greeting
Your email greeting sets the tone for your entire message. The formality of the greeting often depends on your industry and your relationship with the recipient. For example, in a corporate environment or when writing to someone you've never met, a more formal greeting like "Dear [Name]" or "Good morning [Name]" is appropriate.
 
A slightly more casual greeting such as "Hi [Name]" may suffice for closer colleagues or clients with a good rapport. However, it's important to avoid overly informal greetings like "Hey," especially in professional settings, as they can come across as too casual or disrespectful.
 
Email Signature Tips
Your email signature is an extension of your professional brand. It's a helpful tool for providing the recipient with additional information about how to contact you and your role within the organization. At a minimum, your signature should include your full name, job title, company, phone number, and a link to your website or LinkedIn profile if relevant. Depending on your industry, you may also need to include additional information, such as your company's address or your professional license number. Also, make sure your signature is neat and easy to read—long or overly detailed signatures can be distracting.
 
Ending with the Right Sign-Off
Just as the greeting sets the tone, your email sign-off leaves a lasting impression. Consider the tone of your message when choosing a sign-off. For most professional emails, phrases such as "Best regards," "Sincerely," or "Thank you" are widely accepted. These phrases convey respect and professionalism, which ensures your email closes on a positive note. Finally, avoid overly casual or too personal sign-offs in professional emails, such as "Cheers" or "Take care," unless you're sure it fits the context.
 
The "Reply All" Feature
The "Reply All" function is one of the most misused features in email communication. While it can be helpful in certain collaborative environments, more often than not, it clutters inboxes and overwhelms recipients with information they may not need. Before hitting "Reply All," ask yourself: Does everyone on this email thread need to know my response? If not, it's best to reply directly to the original sender. Using "Reply All" only when necessary, will help you avoid unnecessary distractions for your colleagues and keep communication more streamlined.
 
 
Following these simple but important email etiquette guidelines ensures your communication is professional, courteous, and effective.
 

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Potluck Party Etiquette

9/15/2024

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​Four years ago, at the height of COVID, I wrote a LinkedIn article titled "Is the office Potluck Party a thing of the past?" At the time, at least at our office, any party was a no-go. Fast forward four years, and parties are back in session!
 
One of my favorite types of parties is a potluck party because it is more relaxed and allows you to try a variety of yummy dishes. If you've never experienced one, it's a communal meal where guests bring food to share with the other guests.
 
Here are some potluck party tips for both the host and the guest to ensure your next potluck is a pleasant experience for everyone.
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Photo Courtesy of Canva Pro
Potluck Host Etiquette

Planning The Potluck
Consider providing a main course and having guests bring side dishes, desserts, and beverages. Also, decide whether you will provide the plates, cups, napkins, and utensils or ask a guest to bring these items.
 
Handling Dietary Restrictions
When inviting guests, ask about dietary restrictions to ensure there are options for everyone. If someone has very specific dietary needs, suggest they bring a dish they can eat and also be shared with others.
 
What Guests Will Bring
When guests ask what they can bring, have a list of items that will be needed: appetizer, salad, side dish, dessert, beverages, etc. Avoid dictating a specific recipe for an item. Instead, let guests decide what recipe they will bring. Have items on the list that will fit into budgets of all sizes. Remember that not everyone is a chef, and some items may be store-bought. Also, ensure there are enough serving utensils or ask attendees to bring them with their items.
 
Leftovers
If there are leftovers, ask the person who brought the item if you can offer them to other guests to take some home. Providing extra disposable containers for guests to take leftovers home is a nice gesture.
 
Potluck Guest Etiquette
 
RSVP Promptly
RSVP as soon as possible so the host can plan accordingly. It's important to let them know if you're coming and what you'll be bringing to avoid duplicates.
 
What to Bring
If everyone is asked to bring a food item to share, bring something if possible. Remember, you don't have to bring a homemade item. It can be store-bought. When in doubt, ask the person organizing the party for suggestions. If the host has set a theme for the potluck (e.g., Mexican, BBQ, or holiday-themed), make sure your dish fits the theme. If you're unsure, ask for ideas.
 
Ask About Dietary Restrictions
Check with the host or organizer about any dietary restrictions or preferences among the attendees. Label your dish accordingly if it's gluten-free, vegetarian, or contains allergens like nuts. Also, label your dish and serving items if you want them back.
 
Bring Enough for Everyone
Be sure to bring enough food to share with the group. A good rule of thumb is to bring a dish that serves at least 8-10 people or the number the host suggests. Remember to bring appropriate serving utensils for your dish. Hosts may not have extras, and it avoids the hassle of trying to find something last-minute.
 
Be Punctual
One of my pet peeves is when someone shows up with a dish for a potluck party just as the event is winding down. Please arrive on time so the food can be set up properly, and the event can start smoothly. Arriving late can delay the meal and inconvenience the host.
 
Offer To Help the Host
Potlucks are collaborative events, so be proactive in offering to help with setup or cleanup to show appreciation for the host's efforts. Once the event is over, take responsibility for your dish. This includes bringing containers for leftovers and cleaning up any mess.
 
Leftovers
If there are leftovers, ask the host if they would like you to leave them or if someone else would like to take some home.
 
This combination of tips will help you navigate the do's and don'ts of potluck gatherings while making it an enjoyable event for everyone. I'm so glad potlucks are back, are you?
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    About Suzy

    Suzy Lins is a certified etiquette trainer located in Southern California. Educating on manners and etiquette to help people gain confidence to master business and social situations is her passion.


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